FFFASTERRR… or Just Better?

There are no excuses. Reasons, yes, but excuses, no. I have been neglecting this blog for some time now, and it is not all I have been neglecting. The reason is the theme of this blogpost: is it better do things faster, or just, well… better?

The reason – no excuse, mind – there has been little action on this blog (not to mention my social life, outdoor excursions, culinary adventures housekeeping and more) is that I have been completely absorbed in a project. Yes, it is a worthy project. But is any project worth sacrificing one’s happiness and health for?

The project is, of course, the completion of my MA dissertation. Going back to the very origin of this blog, my MA studies were the main driving force behind it. What was really valuable about the blog was having a forum to track and share what I was learning, how I was applying it in my work and where it was leading me. It has been such a precious record of evolution as I have become more self-aware as an educator and expanded my knowledge in the field manifold.

Yet as the dissertation became more of a pressing priority, I became more focused on the product, and less on the process – precisely the kind of thinking I am working so hard to reverse among educational institutions and students alike. Ironically I have fallen into the trap I’ve been pointing out to others!

Now there is a background to this. Members of my MA class technically have until June to submit our dissertations in order to graduate in December 2010. Somehow I got dead set on submitting in February, to graduate in July 2010. While an early graduation would be nice, and I could submit perfectly decent work in time, it has meant that my every waking hour over the past months has gone into this project. Gradually the enthusiasm I have for my research has dissipated as it has become the all-consuming presence in my life, with no room left for play or rest or stepping back for inspiration. Which is sad, because I really love and believe in the work I am doing.

This week I had the revelation that actually there is nothing wrong with completing my dissertation in the normal time allotted, particularly since I have been set back by unexpected relocation, a new job and numerous other false starts in my personal life. Yes, a four month dissertation would be fine, and could perhaps even pass muster for a high mark, but is that really all I want from my studies? It’s called Master’s Degree, after all, because it implies a sense of mastery. Mastery will take more time. And if I am to have mastery over my life, rather than a small academic segment of it, the later deadline is far more likely to make it possible.

That means more living, more blog posts, a better process and a better product.